Corazon de Swiss

February 27, 2008

Bad day

Filed under: All Things Wedding,Bitching,Cheesepuff,Love & Relationships,The Fam — by corazondeswiss @ 8:05 pm

I’m having a bad day today.  I need to whine.  Vent.  I don’t want to talk to anyone I know about it.  CP and I are trying to decide where to live after we get married.  I want to live close my family.  He doesn’t live close to my family.  It’s about an 8 hour drive from where he lives to where my family lives.  (Flying is really not an option- would take almost as long as driving and cost more).  The city/area he lives in is not a place I want to live in for a long time.  I don’t want to live there for a short time.  He thinks he needs to stay with his current company for 2 more years.  (This summer will be 3 years he’s worked there.)  I’m not so sure about that, but then again I’m not an engineer and I’ve had 3 jobs as a therapist since I got out of school 4 years ago. 

I don’t want to raise my children there.  I want to raise them in a place similar to where I grew up.  Living close to my family/in the same town would afford us a lot of options as far as childcare/my working.  Living far away would present us with 3 options: I work full time.  I work not at all.  I work weekends when he is not working. 

I’m scared about moving there.  I’ll be giving up my job (which I really enjoy), being close to my family, my friends here.  I’ll be moving to where he lives, near his friends, and his family.  I’ll have him.  I told him that at the very least we will have to have another place to live.  I cannot move into his apartment and his life and have nothing of mine except Frick and Frack.   

I also told him that I won’t go back to work until after the first of the year.  Starting a healthcare job in December with the holidays coming up would be foolish, esp. if we can afford for me not to work.  There are not a lot of holidays in healthcare and the last person hired almost always works them.  Which would mean no way we’d have the chance to see my family during the holidays. 

I cried today talking to him about it.  I’m so scared of the idea of moving there.  I want to be with him and start our life together, but it feels like moving there we’d just be moving me into his life.  Of course when you walk into the house with tear-stained cheeks everyone wants to talk to you about it.  I don’t want to talk about it anymore.  I’ve been stressed about it all week.  I don’t want my family to get upset with him.  As my grandmother once told my aunt- “Don’t bring your hurts with [husband] to me- you’ll forgive him.  I won’t.”  I don’t want to bring this to my family because I don’t want them to have problems with him.

I’m not asking for advice.  Or assvice.  I just need to vent and not vent to my family.  If you feel compelled to tell me something, could you just tell me it’s going be ok and we’ll figure it out.  ‘Cause I’m feeling a little fragile right now. 

February 21, 2008

It sort of takes over your life…

Filed under: All Things Wedding — by corazondeswiss @ 9:52 pm

So, I’m addicted to the.knot.  Seriously.  I can’t help myself.  But be forewarned those of you anxiously awaiting your engagement rings, when you register on the.knot you’ll get a to-do list with about 20 overdue items on it.  I totally freaked out.  I’d been engaged less than a week and hadn’t even set my wedding date.  And somehow I was already behind.  Keep in mind that I’m a list person.  I love lists.  Make them all the time. (Lose them.  Forget to put things on them, but that’s beside the point.) Anyway.  But this list with its overdue items totally stressed me out.  Fortunately, I’m down to 5 overdue items currently. 
Some of the discussion boards and articles, columns and other girls are so sweet. And helpful.  But also beware of the vultures who will attack you and your ideas and make you feel stupid.  The opinions are everywhere.  And conflicting!  Fortunately (unfortunately?) I have a fiance’ who wants to be involved.  Is even helpful.  (He found the website that led me to our photographer, whom I love, love, love! Unfortunately, he’s still gloating over this.)  Sometimes it’s hard.  And tiresome.  Everyone is interested and offering to help.  But really, there’s not a whole lot everyone else can do.  No one else can decide about the flowers.  The cake.  The food.  The drinks.  The tuxes. The favors.  The guest list. (How to cut it down.  Drastically.) 
Oh and did I mention that my officiant friend’s wife just announced that they are expecting a new (3rd!) baby approx. 3 weeks before the wedding?  (Am currently not worrying about this b/c he hasn’t said anything to me about backing out. Would prefer not to have to eat words and ask pastor of church we are marrying at to officiate. Would prefer not to have to find a way to get CP up here for 3 counseling sessions because said friend told me we could do it with him online.)  I digress.  
Okay.  Bridezilla moment over.   

February 19, 2008

Recently

Filed under: Workin' for a living — by corazondeswiss @ 8:25 pm

So, I have things to tell you!  Unrelated to the w-e-d-d-i-n-g!  How cool is that?! 
Okay well, one might be the tiniest bit related.  An 89 year old man proposed to me yesterday.  Let me back up a little bit. 
 I was seeing this man in his room- and I wanted him to make sure he sat up in the chair for his dinner. 
Me: I want you to sit up  in the chair for dinner- it’s  better for your digestion, builds energy and everyone is better looking sitting up. 
89: I bet you’re better looking lying down…:) 
Me: (Laughing) I’m sure my fiance thinks so.
89: You’re not married yet?
Me: Not yet- we’re getting married in November.
89: Let’s go get married tonight!
Me: My fiance might be disappointed.  Besides it takes a long time to get a wedding together. 
89: Nah, it takes about 15 minutes! 

Funny!!!

Today, I’m talking to a lady who’s been married 50 years.  She got married when she was 15 and her husband was 18.  They started having babies right away and had 6 boys.  She told me they never got divorced because neither of them wanted custody of the kids.  And then she started to laugh.  And so did I! 
She also told me that she wished I lived long enough to spend 50 years married to the same man.  How nice is that? 

Some weeks my job is not just fun, but also funny!!

February 10, 2008

Busy Brie

Filed under: It's All About Me — by corazondeswiss @ 8:17 pm

I’ve actually had a quiet, but busy day at home.  I emptied, washed and refilled cat boxes. I sewed all but the last row of the quilt I’m making for my newest cousin, born on January 31st.  Welcome Phillip Daniel!! 
I did 3 loads of laundry.  I used pet deodorizer and vacuumed.  My gym bag is packed and ready to go.  My breakfast, lunch and snacks are ready in the fridge.  I’ve caught up on blogs and emails.  I’ve caught up on The Knot (I may be addicted to it.) 
And now I’m posting.  Again.  YAY.  Not very exciting, but its a nice treat for me to get some rest, and lots of stuff accomplished. 

February 9, 2008

Playing catch (up)

Filed under: All Things Wedding,Blog Stuff,It's All About Me — by corazondeswiss @ 6:54 pm

Dear readers,

Many apologies for leaving you high and dry this week.  But I have been very busy this week.  I added an evening workout 2 days (in addition to the 5 mornings I already workout).  I went to Ash Wednesday services and started my Lenten discipline(s).
I’m giving up my diet soda.  And getting off the internet by 9:30 nightly so I can get into bed and get some sleep. So all of this is cutting into my writing time.  And my reading time- I’m a little behind on my reading this week. 

And today I picked out my wedding dress!  It was one of the first ones I tried on and I knew.  I knew when she was lacing it up in the dressing room and I really knew when I went out in front of the big mirror and stood on the pedestal.  And almost cried.  It’s perfect.  I feel like a bride when I am in it. 

 

(I am going to get the dress in ivory)  I didn’t think I wanted strapless, but it’s so beautiful! 

What do you think?

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